singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
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