is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
Randomize
