He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
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