He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
