I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
When did angry sex become our thing?
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
the most terrified I've ever been was seeing Danny Devito squirming on the ground in this underwear, covered in hand sanitizer, completely hairless
Randomize
