My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
Farmville is her only friend.
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
Ok: all ex-gfs except you from the last 5 years have or are about to have a baby...be on the lookout...
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
Randomize
