Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
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