Midget sex pt 2 tonight
**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
I'm hungover as fuck. My vagina hurts. I locked my keys in my car. It's about 93* outside. We're having sex in the pool when I get home
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
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