is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
Randomize
