And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
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