just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
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