I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
Randomize
