You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
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Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
Apparently "Do you want me to ruin your day now or later?" is not a good way to tell someone you're pregnant and it's theirs.
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
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