He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
Hippo gnu deer
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
Dude. I'm no longer allowed to use my sword when drinking. I just spent 20 min cleaning up popcorn. I stabbed Moe in the leg and chopped his door knob off
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
I'm a teacher who's always telling kids about the importance of due diligence, yet I'm eating an avocado out of a coffee filter because I'm too lazy to wash dishes
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
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