sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
MY FUCKING CAT JUST GAVE BIRTH AND IM FUCKING STONED AND I FUCKING DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!
yeah, you could tell they werent used to the strange things that i say. they were all outright shocked when i told one guy i hoped someone kidnapped him and stretched his dickhole over a fire hydrant
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
Randomize
