i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
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