my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
Randomize
