I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
I woke up on the side of the highway to the ppl in orange jumpsuits cleaning to comunity service. Not sure which freaked them out more... Finding a dead b ody or me not being dead
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
He was supposed to visit me tonight but he decided to stop in Tacoma so now I'm sitting on my bed naked eating oranges and candy corn while I watch Parks and Rec.
Now I have to hook up with him tomorrow DURING THE DAY.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
It took me longer to finish the bottle of scotch we bought together on New Years than it did for her to meet a new guy and get engaged
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
