I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
I just projectile vomited in a Methodist church parking lot. If Jesus didn't love me before he sure as hell doesn't now.
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
Randomize
