Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
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