I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
Randomize
