why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
Randomize
