their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
organizing the empties. That sober.
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
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