doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
Her mom drove me home after I blew a .13 So there I am wishing her mom a happy mother's day sitting in the passenger seat where I just banged her daughter 15 min prior
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Randomize
