Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
I fell asleep with a half eating burrito in my hand and woke up to cat vomit with burrito in it.
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
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