I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
Randomize
