she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
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