My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
How crunk are you?
I'm a Tom Selleck. Zero being Tipper Gore and max being the Bush twins
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
Thats the last time im "arresting" you to get out of paying your bar tab.
What?! The only reason I married your sister is to have a Cop in the family!
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
You just kept screaming "COME GET ME OFFICER, MY ALLIGATOR MEANS BUSINESS" while swinging a beanie baby alligator at him.
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Randomize
