My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God.
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
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