how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
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