The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize
