Remember that night when i almost got you arrested? Is that funny yet?
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
Randomize
