I just threw up on my dentist
fuck your aforementioned shoe
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
Randomize
