that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
My mom just bought me $200 worth of booze on the condition that I promise I won't have to go to rehab eventually
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
Randomize
