What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
I smell stomach acid.
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
Way to fucking accidentally drunk dial me while you're talking to and buying other girls drinks. Don't call me.
Randomize
