The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
She wanted to make popcorn, but the air-popper was broken. So she dumped the entire container of kernels into the clothes dryer. Drunk movie night was a success!
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
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