My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
Randomize
