My cousins just decided to make a catapult to spread my Grandpa's cremated remains. I love my family.
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
Randomize