woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
tell your sister to shave her snatch
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
Binging muscle relaxers because when ur 33 you can no longer SHAKE IT LIKE A POLAROID PICTURE for 2hrs w/o consequences. Fuck you, Age.
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
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