Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
i pretty much saved your life. you were so conviced that your nail polish remover bottle was "Vodka Lemon"
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
Just stabbed myself in the face trying to lick melted cheese off a kitchen knife.
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
Randomize
