i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
It's just like the Real World with babies
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
I was freaked out. No man over 50 is allowed to touch me. Ever. Unless you're Michael Bolton. Then please do.
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
Randomize
