she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
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