are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
The only reason you're wearing underwear tonight is cause you have a family dinner before
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
My fucking roommate unpluged my alarm; I pissed on his clean clothes.
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Randomize
