You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
Guess who's still drunk but on time to court to represent a DUI?
You are my hero
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
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