Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
I'm so stoned I just sat here for like at least 45 min thinking about how I would get some jack in the box tacos if only I knew where my wallet was and then I kind of blinked and finally noticed I had literally been staring at my wallet the ENTIRE fucking time
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
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