Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
Randomize
