I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
Nyc is like a mosaic of my failed dates.
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
My girlfriend and my fuck buddy both started their periods this weekend. The good news is, neither of them are pregnant. The bad news is, I'll have to find someone else to fuck til next weekend. No wait.....that's good news too.
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
Chasing shots with sriracha-covered mini toast was, in retrospect, not the best idea.
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
Randomize
