You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving
Your blankets are not drunk friendly
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
The brides mom put a 6 year old in charge of me to make sure I don’t get too drunk before the wedding
Randomize
