i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
Randomize
