Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
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